Dependency on stress

One day one of my friend was telling me that he performs his best when he is stressed, when there is pressure to finish the job, when the deadline has arrived. The belief system has become such that stress is necessary to perform at your peak, that stress in necessary to deliver your best. Stress has become a drive to achieve goals, it is replacing passion and love for the work. Is this the right way of working??

Consider this scenario suppose with age I get pain in my knee and I don't take care of it thinking it to be natural with age. I will still be walking but this time with a lot off pain. Suppose I live my days without taking adequate care of it, just trying to ignore it and then one day suddenly a situation arrives where I need to run, Then will I be able to run?? Absolutely NO.

Same is with stress. Look at a child he/she is never stressed. Just try to recall how you felt the last time you were stressed, which probably would not be very long back. If you cannot check it on emotional level just check it on physical level. Your heart beat must have increased, your pulse rate must have increased, at times your mouth becomes dry or your legs and hands start to tremble.You get a very uncomfortable feeling in the stomach. Your head gets heavy.

Now examine yourself did you perform better when you were stressed? NO, I can guarantee you would have performed better if you were calm and happy. Consider as a child when we went to give exams, due to anxiety we would make mistakes at places where we knew the answer and later after finishing the exams we would find those mistakes ourselves and call them careless or silly mistakes. Now, were those mistakes silly or we were silly to get anxious and nervous?

Load or pressure or targets are fine because if there would be no target we would take six days to do what we could do in 24 hours. It's a wrong belief that pressure creates stress. Absolutely no, pressure is just a situation.

   STRESS =                 PRESSURE (SITUATION)
                               RESILIENCE(INNER STRENGTH)

We have no control over situation(pressure) but we definitely have control over as to how we react to the situation(pressure) which is called inner strength. Our negative thoughts under pressure creates stress. Like suppose I need to complete certain work in the office by tomorrow that's a pressure a situation, anyhow I have to do the work. But here I can make a choice regarding my thoughts. Will my thoughts be negative or positive. If I start to think what if i am not able to finish the job, what if someone else finishes the job before me and takes away my promotion, if I do not finish I might get fired and on and on. These negative thoughts create the stress and not the pressure and then later after completing the work we say oh man this work was so stressful, wish I never have to face it again. Common is it right to blame the situation?

During pressure just take a little time to watch your thoughts and change them to positive ones, thoughts that will give you joy, thoughts that will make you love the situation. Negative thoughts create stress and not the situation.

Stress and worry is abnormal

Getting stressed out has become so common now days that we consider getting stressed out is normal. But it is not normal it is very abnormal, I know this fact can be a little hard to digest but it is true. People say that I have lost my job, I am not getting any new job how can I help but not worry.

Just for a moment put the scenario in this way that your friend is not getting a job while you are doing well then what would your advice be to him...

You would definitely say that worrying and getting stressed out is not going to help, you will soon find a good job just relax. I know it is easy said then done but this is the only solution.For a moment analyze what you need to get a job you must be confident, cool headed and you got to believe in yourself. Now if you worry and if you are stressed then do you retain these quality. Absolutely NO you loose them then how are you going to get the job.

Here you have to make a choice that I will be happy only if I get a job or achieve something or I will be happy and achieve. If you choose the former than you are going to worry and get stressed every time a obstacle comes in the way and quiet possible you might break down while if you choose the later you will be able to handle all the obstacle calmly and confidently and will definitely achieve your goal.

I recommend everyone practice yoga and meditation to control your mind and keep your body fit. Yoga and meditation has many benefits I have explained them in my older posts. To learn and practice yoga you can refer to the following books.



Here I would like to disclose that for every book you but I will be getting small token of money which will be of great help to me. Thankyou everyone who has bought any of these books.

It is only your response that matters

Many of you think that "I will be happy after I buy a new house or buy a new car or buy a diamond ring or get promotion etc. etc.". Fine given for a moment that you will be happy after you buy a new house. But in reality are you really happy even after you buy the new house, no then you think that I will be happy after I buy a new car or I will be happy after I get the interior designed even after this you are not happy, you keep postponing your happiness on something else.

Suppose you buy a beautiful jewellery set and you are very happy, then someone comes and says that this jewellery design is not good or it is fake, then what happens, you become unhappy again, you become terribly sad. Consider another scenario you buy a beautiful jewellery set and are very happy and another person looks at the set and thinks how sad I cannot afford this set and becomes unhappy and another person does not like the design and is looking for another design to become happy.

My friends what I am trying to convey here is that if the physical object or situation had contained happiness it would have given happiness to everyone but above we see that for same jewellery set the responses of different people is different  and it is their response that makes them happy or unhappy.

Consider this scenario after a failure one person goes in depression another suicides while another says okay I will start over again and goes way ahead. 

Remember one thing that the way you respond towards the object or situation determines whether you will be happy or unhappy and the way you respond is completely under your control because if the object or a situation had the power to generate your response then it would generate the same response for everyone. It is the way you choose to react that will make you happy or unhappy.

3 must do activities during the day

1. Exercise: Like food is required to survive same way pumping your heart is as important as eating. It is a fuel for your body. It is even more important than eating.It pumps oxygen into your lungs which oxygenates the blood in your body and as a result your entire body is rejuvenated. It is very sad that it is ignored by many of us. If you are a food lover I am not asking you to restrict your diet all you need to do is to workout rigorously for around 45 minutes daily, so that you can enjoy your food even more. I recommend doing yoga as it aligns mind and body and energizes the body by being aware of the breathe.

2. Love yourself: If you can do this trust me miracles will work in your life, here I don't mean being arrogant but a healthy respect and love for yourself. Trust me you are a genius, there's no one on earth like you, you are unique so why want to be like someone else. Be inspired by others but aspire to be yourself. Stop comparing yourself with others you have your own talents.

3. Focus on the abundance: focus on the abundance and not on lack as what you focus on is what you get more in life. Start to focus on all the things you have, just take a piece of paper and a pen and write down all the things you have from running water to electricity, from the house you have to the vehicle you drive, your family, your friends, your work which pays you, the good roads you get to travel on, the food you eat etc.
It will shift your energy from lack to abundance, it will create positive energy around you and you will see  within 3-4 minutes of this practice that you start to feel wonderful within. 

Dr. Robert Puff

Dr. Robert Puff a happiness expert, author and speaker shares the importance of living in the present and how vital tool it is to keep us happy throughout our lives. I am providing the link to the podcast below do check it out guys. Its amazing.
http://www.happinesspodcast.org/happiness/202/

keys to happiness in life

We all know that happiness cannot be bought, no one sells happiness. you will not find anyone salesman saying buy happiness for $1000 or $5000. Happiness is a purest state of mind, whenever you are free of negative emotions you are happy, just remember as to how you feel when you see your small baby after you come home from day's work, all of a sudden your anger over your boss or over your junior is all gone and you are full of love and really very happy. You becoming happy after seeing your small baby is because of the feeling of love. Love is the greatest and the most purest emotions of all. Love is like a magic, it transforms your life within seconds. It makes wonders happen.Whenever you are in the state of love that energy and vibe can be felt around you and as a result you touch other peoples life also who come in contact with you.

Yes Love is the key to happiness. The more you love yourself,others and the circumstances more happiness you will get. Gautam Buddha was no extraordinary in terms of mass and muscle than you and me, he was extra ordinary in terms of giving love.

To give love you must love yourself first, only when you overflow with love than your love can reach others. There is no limit to the amount of love. It is infinite. You can fill the entire universe with your love. This is what Jesus Christ and Gautam Buddha did. They just loved. Love is the only solution to be happy and its indeed very easy to be happy. 

5 ways on how to love myself

No matter who you are, where you are, what you are,you are perfect. You are a tremendous creation, you are bundle of infinite energy and power. You are wonderful and beautiful. You have the potential to be and achieve anything. Your mind is the best gift you could ever get. You are absolutely lucky to be having eyes to be reading this article, for having the hands to operate the computer, for having a beautiful mind which makes your body function. You are a unique creation of god, no one on earth is like you, you are just amazing. Your natural state is love, once you get back to your natural state you will be over flowing with love, you will feel so beautiful within.

Here are 5 techniques to love yourself:
1. Imagine yourself: Just sit down, close your eyes and with all your concentration imagine yourself having become the person you want to be. Remember that you are only imagining yourself doing stuffs and acting the way you would if you were that person and don't imagine any other individual. Imagine it and feel it at every level, having the feeling of having become is most important.

2. Mirroring: Whenever you are in front of the mirror just jump with joy, and with all your love look at yourself in the mirror and say to your image with all the fun and expression "I looooovvvveeee yooouuuu, yoooouuuuu are aweeeeesomeeeee, you are amazing". The whole idea behind this exercise is to see you having the love and respect for yourself.

3. Practice gratitude: Thank god for making you the way you are, be grateful to be you, be grateful for eyes you see with, be grateful for your ears, be grateful for the nose, be grateful for the mouth you eat and speak with, be grateful for the hands you have,be grateful for the legs you have, be grateful for the computer you have,be grateful to be alive,be grateful for this day,be grateful for your family,be grateful for the house you live in,be grateful for the food you eat,be grateful for the vehicle you drive,be grateful for your friends. Be grateful for everything around you. The idea behind this is to feel abundance, this is the most amazing practice to follow. Be grateful from all your heart.

4. Exercise : Do yoga or any other exercise daily, it makes you feel sexy and amazing, and until you don't feel amazing you wont be able to do amazing stuff. Yoga releases all the negative emotions from your mind and helps you becoming centered.

5. Be with yourself: Whenever during the day you feel let down or feel like you are lacking confidence, just         

start to focus on your breath, just cut off from all the noise around you and get your focus only on yourself, just feel that no one exists around you it is only you. It is very handy tool to get focus back to yourself. 

5 ways to be happy

1. Be only in present moment: It is your present that has all the happiness and it is only the present that exists, past is history, tomorrow is mystery and present is a gift of god that's the reason it is called present.

2. Live your life: Stop thinking about others, stop thinking about what good or bad they did to you. All that matters is how good or bad you do to yourself, what you give to yourself is all that matters. Just be the person you want to become, just feel it at every level of having become that person in the present and you will develop the attitude required to become that person hence, you will become that person even without you realizing it.

3. Give in your 100%:  No matter what work you do your job is to give in your 100%, keep digging yourself to bring in more of yourself, keep bringing out that extra 1%, this 1% will make all the difference in your work.

4. Live today only: Never think that you will this job or that job tomorrow, you never know whether you will exist or not and even if you exist life is very short, days pass into weeks, weeks into months and months into years before we realize that our life is over. Don't be afraid of anything, fear only time. If you feel shy in doing something just remember that today is only of 24 Hrs and I don't know of tomorrow because every embarrassment falls in the face of death.

5. Care for your body and mind: I have explained the importance of exercise and meditation in my previous posts many times so I will not be explaining it here again. 

Be centered to yourself

Don't think about others, never compare yourself to others, never compete with others and never regret not being like other person. If you want to compare and compete than do it with your yesterday and make sure that you are better in your today than you were yesterday. It's good to be inspired by other individuals but never aspire to become like them, you are unique and every individual on earth is unique, hence, be yourself, be grateful for what you are. If you compare yourself to others you will only loose your self confidence, if you think about others you again loose self belief. If you lack in confidence its only because you compare yourself to others and regret not being like them. You have the potential to be and do anything, just imagine yourself doing it, just feel yourself doing it and you will be shortly doing it and it will also boost your self confidence. It is very important to remember that you are below no one and above no one. Every individual is equal. Be inspired but aspire to inspire others. Just imagine yourself in your thoughts, imagine yourself being the individual you want to become. Its as simple as if you can imagine something you can achieve or become that.

Plan your day

It is very important to plan your day, write it down and stick to it.If you don't write it down there's a huge possibility that you will get distracted during the day and miss out on activities that's most important to you. There's an old saying failing to plan is planning to fail. Every morning make a list of activities you need to perform during the day and put them in priority. Do the most important activity first followed by others. Remember to include activities like exercise, meditation,dancing, singing, perform these activities just for 30 days and you will see it will become your strength. It will improve your efficiency, improve the result of your work. Your outer world reflects your inner world.  Hence its very important to include these activities in your daily life and perform them daily. Don't spend all the time working. Make life first and your life will make a living for you.

2 mins of FUN at Poland Festival

Giving your heart to others

All it means is to be helpful to others. When someone asks you for help or you see anyone who needs help, be it anything like a poor may ask for food, or someone struggling may ask for little money etc. then be grateful to the creator that he has given you in abundance so that you are in a position to help others, be grateful that others are asking for your help, be grateful for he has made you worth helping others. And with all your heart, feeling all the love for that person and gratefulness toward the creator (or god or whatever you believe in) offer that person whatever you can. Be grateful to that person for he is making you feel blessed, making you feel lucky and making you realize that you have in abundance, give that person your blessings along with material thing that you can offer . Even if someone does not need your help in terms of monetary still give that person your blessings, wish good for him, and do it from all your heart you will feel so blessed and so happy.

It is so important to learn the art of giving because the more you give from your heart the more you will receive. You have everything in infinite, you just need to feel it, the more you can feel it, the more you will receive. And giving others, thinking of others before yourself, making sure that no person who you meet goes empty handed (just offer a rose) makes you feel abundant, makes you feel blessed.

"If everyone knew the art of giving, no one would be complaining" - Gautam Buddha.